Do I have a Relationship Ocd?

relationship ocd

Relationships bound people together; they bound a person as a partner, people as family members, people as a community, a nation, and so on. Relationships are a key to good health and happiness, be they romantic or friendly.

Relationships have their own set of challenges when it comes to mental health. An unsuccessful and unhappy relationship can ruin the life of a person on so many levels, both professionally and personally. In terms of mental health, a disrupted relationship can cause myriad conditions such as depression, anxiety, fear, and others. The least known effect can be called a Relationship ocd.

What is a Relationship OCD?

Relationship OCD is a form of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)—a mental disorder that causes an uncontrollable amount of fear accompanied by unwanted thoughts about something. When your relationship starts to worry you more than it should and causes unnatural discomfort and anxiety, chances are this is a relationship ocd.

OCD in relationships can cause you to have frequent and uncontrollable thoughts that are in your mind. You might feel that you have no control over what you think or do. Both your thoughts and actions are affected by relationship OCD. For example, people with relationship issues might think that their partner and husband don’t love them, or they aren’t worthy of love,or fear of losing them.

Relationship ocd can ruin relationships and the mental health of the person and their partner. Relationship ocd can have damaging consequences for life if left unchecked.

What is obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD)?

OCD symptoms include episodes of obsessions—repetitive thoughts that won’t go away—and compulsive habits—the urge to do something repeatedly in reaction to the obsession or obsessive thoughts.

OCD in general is accompanied by common cases of contamination and germ-related fears that might be mild to severe and might require hospitalization if conditions worsen. However, relationship OCD is concerned with things about their romantic relationships and their recurrent thoughts about them.

OCD in general is a psychotic disorder, and its impact on mental health itself is harrowing to a person’s overall well-being.

OCD in relationships can seem like a new term for many people, especially its specific nature, but it is only concerned with relationships. People might have spent hours looking for OCDS and relationships online by searching for OCDS on Reddit. Nowadays, people are more aware of their orientation and overall preference when it comes to relationships. Small doubts and fears, like OCD, in relationships can be challenging for someone; hence, recognizing signs is very important so it can be resolved quickly.

What are Relationship ocd and symptoms?

Question arises: What are the signs and symptoms to look for in relationships in someone? 

Repetitive thoughts

Someone with a relationship ocd would tend to have repetitive thoughts about their partner, such as:

-He didn’t call me. Doesn’t he love me?

-My wife does not kiss me goodnight every day. Does she hate me?

-Although these thoughts are completely normal to have, their intensity and recurrence matter. If these thoughts are repetitive and cause you disruption to the extent you can’t think clearly or focus on your other activities, then chances are it is the effect of the relationship.

Reassurance from the partner

Someone with a relationship OCD would constantly try to seek reassurance about their relationship from their partner and spouses. They even tend to ask about their relationship with their family, friends, and colleagues just to know their choice is right.

They may try to seek validation from others and research through online quiz books to align their thoughts with the consensus.

Anxiety in OCD relationships

Some people in relationships may have anxiety about their relationship, such as thinking that their relationship would fall apart or that their partner would cheat on them. What if they break up? There is a constant anxiety in the person with the relationship ocd, and it hampers their daily life activities and reasoning ability.

Comparing with others

In relationship OCD, a person may try to measure their relationship status by comparing themselves with other people or other situations. They often compare themselves to other couples, to their ex-partners, or compare their partner to a book or movie character. They might fixate on some other attributes when it comes to comparing their relationship, regardless of how it can affect their loved ones.

What is the cause of OCD?

OCD and relationships themselves are not medical diagnoses; they are usually triggered by their underlying causes, such as trauma caused by PTSD, or their relationship has become a medium to channel their obsession and compulsive behavior of being worried and always checking.

What is the treatment and ways to cope with OCD?

Open communication

Communication is the key to a successful relationship. OCD in relationships tends to feed on the idea that relationships become obsessions if they are not openly addressed. If you feel you might be someone who has relationship-OCD symptoms, tell them about it and have an open dialogue with your partner about your thoughts and feelings.

Remember that obsession is always harmful. Fixating on something doesn’t bring anything, and an open dialogue can help de-escalate the whole situation.

Seeking professional help

If you think the relationship ocd symptoms are causing excessive worry, then plenty of therapeutic techniques can be used to help a person with relationship OCD. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) can be used to  deal with the symptoms of OCD by modifying the reaction caused by anxiety. CBT is used to challenge the irrational thoughts of a person and how they react differently when faced with the triggering factor.Other than CBT, Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) is also used to treat people who are affected by trauma.


Medical treatments are not usually used in relationship ocd unless the obsession has caused severe depression and anxiety in the person. In that case, antidepressant and anti-anxiety medications may be used.

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